Instablogs - Mobile - I wonder what kinda' soap do the presidential candidates use to get rid of the stench from a long hard day?

After a long hard day of lying, smiling and ass-kissing, I have always wondered one thing about the current presidential candidates.

What kind of soap do they use.

I know it ain’t a “rocket science” question but it’s certainly a relevant one.

I gotta’ keep it real!

I’m totally against a stinky-ass president in the White House and i’m sure Bill Clinton, Michelle Obama and Cindy McCain would agree.

So let’s get to it.

We’ll start with John McCain, first.

When I look at John I think, oh yeah, this is an Ivory soap baby for sure!

Basically because Ivory soap is white like John McCain, floats in water like John McCain and has been around since 1879, pretty much just as long as John McCain. Plus, the famous porn star, Marilyn Chambers modeled and was featured on Ivory Snow detergent packaging!

What a hoot!

So if John and Marilyn were ever to meet up, they’d have loads and loads to talk about! (Low-down & dirty snicker!) Especially about her 1972 hardcore movie, “Behind the Green Door!

P.S. Hey Cindy, if these two were ever to meet up, don’t leave this chick alone with your man for one second because basically one second is all that she would need! (Another low-down & dirty snicker!)

By the way, John, coochie, coochie, coo! (Literally!)

Movin’ on to Barack Obama.

When I look at homeboy, I think definitely a Zest soap kinda’ guy.

I mean you got people passing out at his plagiarized speeches and women wanting to screw him.

At this time, I would like to send a shout out to Amber Lee Ettinger! You go Obama girl!

If those two things don’t say “zest”, nothing else will.

Plus, homeboy is chocked full of gusto, vigor and enthusiasm meaning he doesn’t need any Viagra in the bedroom!

Hey Michelle Obama, I know who’s gettin’ lucky! (Another low-down & dirty snicker!)

And last and certainly least, well at least according to the polls, is Hillary Clinton.

I can definitely see her using some soap ala’ Summer’s Eve Feminine Wash style.

For the oh so obvious reason, she has a vagina, she’s technically a woman and she’s somewhat feminine. (Loud-ass Snicker!)

But like anything with the Democrats this election year, that’s debatable!